Feminism is the subscription to the belief that the sexes should be equal. Obviously, everybody who isn’t a complete tosser is therefore a feminist, whether they label themselves as one or not. They can bitch about the girlie nature of the name ‘feminism’ all they want, and profess to be egalitarians but they’re feminists and that’s the end of it.
Now obviously there is a spectrum when it comes to any kind of belief, and the people who refuse to use the word ‘feminism’ despite definitely adhering to a feminist rhetoric are at the lower end of the spectrum. Then, a little further down the line you come across people like me. People who actually read feminist literature and articles and the like about ‘women’s issues’ such as FGM, the burqa debate, and sex workers’ rights etc. People who blog and get into debates about feminism but who don’t allow it to take over their lives in a feminazi kinda way. Which brings me to the other end of the spectrum. The Internet Feminists.
Perhaps you haven’t come across them. Or perhaps you have, but masqueraded under a different title, that could include, but is not limited to RadFems, Tumblr Feminists, Feminazis and Intersectional Feminists.
Yeah. Intersectional. I went there.
The idea of intersectional feminism is great. Taking race, class, sexuality etc. etc. into account when entering into a feminist discussion is definitely something that you should do. Being racist or homophobic is obviously a bad thing. Thus, the principle of intersectional feminism is wonderful. (I’m not going to elaborate on this any further here. You have Google. Utilise it.)
However, intersectional feminism in theory is a lot different to intersectional feminism in practise.
Take trigger warnings, something that have been taken on by intersectional feminists even more than a lamp post pissed on by the baddest dog in town. Now, providing a trigger warning at the beginning of a video or article that may contain extremely graphic violence/sexual violence is one thing. Providing trigger warnings relating to every little thing that might possibly make somebody think of something unpleasant is, at best, unnecessary and at worst, downright offensive. Real life doesn’t come with trigger warnings. I don’t need to be mollycoddled. Sure, if you’re about to show me a decapitation video or discuss how somebody committed suicide in an overly detailed manner, then give me some warning. If, however, you’re going to tell me that one girl pulled another girl’s hair, I don’t need to be warned of the imminent discussion of violence. I’ll be able to cope. Honest.
Treating adult women like babies is not the way to advance feminism. You cannot possibly conceive of every single thing that may trigger a bad memory for somebody, and protect them from it. Hell, some people have crippling phobias of bald heads, or buttons, or chins. Do we need to put a trigger warning for buttons and baldness in our posts just in case one of these people stumbles across our article and needs to be protected?!
Exactly the same thing has happened with cultural appropriation. I get that blackface is offensive. I feel as irritated as the next person when I see a white person with dreadlocks surrounded by Buddha ornaments and thinking that they are so fucking cultured because they went to Thailand for a couple of weeks on their gap yar. I also find it really bloody offensive when deadbeat chavs add a string of plastic rosary beads to their tracksuits to look cool. You’re not a Catholic. Stop it.
However, blatantly ripping off somebody’s religion or cultural heritage for your own amusement is not the same as a white woman wearing hoop earrings (because omfg only black women are allowed to wear hoop earrings, obviously) or the same white girl eating sushi with chopsticks. No, she’s not culturally appropriating black or Japanese culture. She’s just enjoying her food and wearing a cool pair of earrings.
Privilege is another one. Yes, I get that as a slim, able-bodied, cisgender, white western woman, I am more privileged than the vast majority of people on this planet. Yes, I get that my male counterpart is even more privileged than I am. However, do I constantly tell him that he needs to ‘check his privilege’ (read: ‘shut the fuck up’) every time he ventures an opinion to me? No. Do I deny white men, and straight men, and middle class men opinions just because they are more privileged than their transgender black counterparts? No. Because that’s sexist.
Yeah, sorry, sexism towards men exists. (Not going to say ‘reverse sexism’ because it isn’t reverse anything. It is sexism. End of story.)
If I’m being totally honest, I hold the vast majority of these ‘feminists’ in contempt. I’d much rather educate myself about the actual suffering of actual people in Afghanistan, Yemen, Syria, Iraq, Niger, Somalia ETC ETC ETC than throw a fucking hissy fit over some white girl getting cornrows on holiday.
I’d rather be glad that Emma Watson has made millions of people think about gender equality than bitch about her for being white.
Priorities, people.
The Grumpy Bitch 
Funny you mention this, because this morning I am writing an open blog post to MRAs and Internet Feminists. Please do come and take a look when it is up 🙂 I would very much value your input as someone who clearly wants to see all sides of the gender politics debate.
That’s a fantastic step and I say that as a man who has been in many arguments with internet feminists who
a) Say that there is no sexism against men and
b) There is no such thing as female gender privilege
I’ve had RadFems and Internet feminists on my blog, far more prevalent now I am talking a lot more about male mental health. Some of their words, though well-meaning, are very unhelpful. “If only men were more like women!” they’d say “here, read this article in Cosmo by a woman that tells men how they should be”. It’s not the place of any woman to decide how men should be.
Other comments are downright disgusting, but I never clear them.
Forgot to address this. No, I wouldn’t call myself a feminist because I think at its core, feminism is about women’s rights, not equality. If it was about equality, it would also be interested in removing female gender privilege and raising awareness of areas where men are disadvantaged (that society values us for our utility and as “success objects”), and for someone who does recognise those things are a problem that need tackling, the word “feminism” becomes superfluous.
You might personally think that is splitting hairs, but I have yet to see anyone give a sold argument for why anyone who truly believes in equality should use “feminist” rather than “egalitarian”.
My post is up now by the way 🙂
Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂 Hm, I guess we willl have to disagree on that one because I DO believe that a lot of feminist work IS about benefitting men e.g when it comes to them having equal parenting rights etc. I’ll check your post out now 🙂
Do you have an example you could link to where a feminist group has worked for men’s parenting rights? I work in this area in Canada and organised women’s groups here seem wholly concerned with redefining domestic abuse as anything a man does that his female partner doesn’t like.
That’s interesting, here in the UK there is a lot of awareness raising of female to male domestic violence, male mental health issues (due to the high number of male suicides) etc.
I can’t think of much campaigning in the UK raising awareness of F on M violence, personally. It is still treated rather as a bit of a joke despite that 40% of DV victims are male.
Suicide though is another issue and I agree certainly in the last few years there has been a lot more media attention dedicated to the shocking numbers of men killing themselves. I don’t know if you were aware, but men represent 75% of all suicides.
Yeah, I worked for the samaritans and a lot of our campaigns were targeted towards men 🙂
And i dont think female to male domestic violence is seen as a joke.
May I recommend you watch this video from The Amazing Atheist on feminism vs equality.
https://www.youtube.com/embed/P-Nw3zyYpvs?version=3&rel=1&fs=1&showsearch=0&showinfo=1&iv_load_policy=1&wmode=transparent
I have yet to see a single ‘feminist’ (today’s version) write a word about Rotherham abuse or what is happening with regard to REAL ‘rape culture’ in the UK. I’ll stick with what my mother taught me about feminism by her example – not Beyonce’s.
Not entirely sure your comment is relevant to anything I actually wrote about…also I wasn’t aware I’d included any mention of Beyonce but okay.
You can’t even TYPE the word Rotherham, can you ?
I gratuated from an English degree with a First Class Honours so I am perfectly capable of typing, thank you very much.
And actually I wrote quite extensively about the Rochdale child sex gangs on my old blog about 3 years ago, which as you’ll know is a pretty much identical case as far as rape culture is concerned. Stop making assumptions about strangers and lose the chip on your shoulder.
Still can’t type it, huh? Three years ago on your old blog. Why do feminists in the UK ignore this incredibly important issue for women ? Seriously, is it fear ? Political correctness ? What good is feminism if you don’t fight for victims of rape? It’s your country – do something. I am asking a legitimate question – how is this not an issue for you?
It is an issue, that is why I have addressed it in my previous writing. Anyhow, your comments don’t seem to relate to anything I’ve said in the piece so I’d appreciate it if you took your beef with feminism elsewhere, like up your arse.
Still dodging the issue. Are you in fear of your life? What is it? Why don’t you care enough to write about it? If you are afraid – just type a secret code, like ‘help!’
Trololol.
No, I’m using my real name. I want to know why? Seriously, is it just too difficult to write about it in the UK?
No, that’s why I have written about it.
Ok. Would you consider writing something new since your old blog is unavailable and it’s been three years? Your blog is very measured and intelligent and devoid of really asinine things that do the movement so much damage. It would be fantastic if you would write about these young women and girls. I love England and my interest and concern about this issue would only be second if it happened in my town. Would you please consider it?
I will consider it yes
With all sincerity – thank you. This is close to home for you. You are a real hero.
With respect, there’s nothing appropriative about dreads. Dreads existed long before Rasta, in various non-african cultures including celts and norwegians, as well as greeks, various middle easterners, etc. Dreads AND the hat, that’s a different line, but dreads alone are just hair without any specific religious significance.
I kinda agree but you wouldnt believe the number of intersectional feminists who say the opposite!